Here

   days have gone too tough on me---again as always be. the best being i can hold as healings are VAMPIRE. please don't get me wrong....

   It's been my lifelong mask against failures and pains from the outer realm. the world is not fair for living in it isn't that fair.

   i know i'll be on the hanging edge of it but it will gonna fill my spirit. I know it will help me escape, somehow, from the mere manifistation of falling hard from the ground.

   this is my bare necessity in life--- my only protection here on earth~however, my faith had never failed me.

      Sigh!!!

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      Before i will start my out-pourings i want to extend my gratitude to the guys and gals who had made there visit. Thank you for being stained.

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      The days after my last post are very intoxicating--- just as how i felt it as it had have happened to me.

      I had recieved some of my grades. Even few it satisfies me yet i 'm burdened. Why? My adventures in playing number in my mathematics subjects just ended last semester with my Integral Calculus. And, my realization comes next that i'm starting to deluded with numbers--- i'm not feeling glad about it anymore. I don't know if its the teacher factor or the problem is me. I don't want to blame my self because i'm an intrapersonal organism. Only by grace, Jesus H. Christ, i come to divert my guilt to something that will have a positive outcomes--- Yehey! i'm starting to have emotional depth. Back to the issue, I'm feeling insecure to my fellow majors, which is not right. Luckly, i have subjects that i'm alone, separated from them. In there i can be a rabid hould as crazy as i can. I'm enjoying the feeling. But, i'm not saying i don't enjoying there company. I really treasure our "dipoles". I love being with these funny guys. They are unique individuals. Really.

    I had  mountains of requirements to finish--- i have just finished my research study all by my self this day.

    I have to get even with my subjects that are rated unsatisfactory. I had to work hard.GO! GO! GO!

    I'm actually running for Vice-president in our Student Government. Imagine! I have to  have "hug-and-kisses" with lots of campus fellahs. I'm back to my elementary and high school politician attitude--- ung parang TRAPO-effect. But, unlike traditional politician i'm doing my stuffs weel and good. I have to work hard because my rivals are with caliber. Why i say so? Education, to where i belong, is the third college in a row as far as population is concerned. You know, the usual thing, they are to support there fellow college-mates. That's why i have to craft a speech something conscience-biting.

     Summer is fast approaching, that would mean that finals is coming ahead of it. I'm worried. Financially, for that matter. I under-estimated my finances that even my allowance for February and March is not enough. I really am a jerk. I think my hypothesis of having a brain abcess is realistically concluding. I'm missing events and schedules. I can't recount or trace back my unworthy expenditures. Maybe, i really am very busy.

      I felling that my heart is as heavy as the heaviest metal on the galaxy.

      I'm having lots of burden that made me felt that i'm on the crucifixion table of Jesus Christ--- despite that have long, wavy hair and slender, almost sullen, figure this time.

      Sigh!!!

      The Wowowee tragedy is by far the most terrifying disaster in the entertainment scene---as far as i'm concerned.

      I don't want to retaliate the whole unfortunate event rather focus on the drawbacks it posted to ABS-CBN family, social morality, Philippine figure outside the country, security and political responsibility.

      So, what's the role of the GMA-Kapuso? Why i have to include the rival channel in the course of this write-up?

      February 04 of 2006 is the date when Kapamiya is mourning and having heavy-shoulders for what the catastrophy had brought about. It killed almost 79 (the figure is subject to correction) and injured persons of above 300 in number.

       According to Willie Revillame, the show's host, it 's not the intention of raising the show's rating that they allow the Ultra, the venue of the show's anniversary, to be flooded by people. However, it is the joy of giving these people the chance to get the prizes at stake. Mainly, the show is intended, as what it usually does in its regular slot, to give millions of "love-gifts" to those who they've believe had made the show possible--- the support of the common 'tao'. Indeed, the show have nothing to be blamed for. Yet, they are responsible for the dent of the entire debacle. And it is properly done-over with by postponing the anniversary instead replacing it with public service and tap-at-the-back concerns---even Game Ka Na Ba is not shown and Pinoy Big Brother Celebrity Edition is moved to the next day. Moreover, the assurance of helping those who are afflicted by the said blow is worth a justification.

       As i listen to the news, which is in the same channel, i wonder how the other ground in the other fence took the scenario. Just this day, i went home after going to church catching mass for the victims done by the celebrity. After it, ASAP, the noontime variety show, had given the heart-warming tribute to the victims. It turned out to be solemn in the house of Kapamilya. Good thing ASAP did not ruin the essence of its shows by ending it unsomberly. But, i can see the torment and unease is there.

     However, as i surf the net for a video of the rival TV of what's happening on the other side of the railing i was moved to witness sympathy. Then, i prayed my sorry. In SOP, the counter of ASAP, they also gave a tribute. But, not as bemoaning as the affected-side. That's why i gave a faint smile figuring the alienation of the tribute to the audience. Yes, they have the right to express grief, as a Pinoys, i can't avoid to think foul stature in my gray matter.

      Lack of security is not an issue. Why? It is because the show is not national event that it needs battalion of defenses and safeguarding buddies. It is just an ordinary routine inthe television---so to happened it had an extraordinary, griefing outcome. What is so good is that the vicinity was then secured for further accidents. Red croos and the national police had done there jobs.

       Until now, i haven't heard any message from the president. How unusual? I mean, it's not just a message to the show but a message to the victims. Tough she had given Press Secretary Bunye her statement, personal words is still differnt in sense. I'm still waiting. However, i stand corrected if there is.

        It will really create a big screen in the foriegn land or the global village. The stampede is very alarming. I personally just don't know how thye outside world will tag it to be. I'm also waiting for there headlines. I'm pretty sure it's gonna be a bad image.

       What i actualy care about is that no matter what we are doing, where we are, who we are in the community, we are united in compassion as Pinoys.

        I had seen the effort, the help, the apprehension, the understanding, and the true values of a Pilipino men and women. We are one.

         After all, there is noone to blame is everybody had taken his/her part to extend hands to alleviate the sufferings. Like what GMA7 did, we should understand each other in times of loss and crises. For after all we are one nation.

        
 

  "Money is the root-caused of all evil"
 
  "Money makes a man poor in spirit"

  "Money is not the be-all and end-all of everything"

  "Who is rich? He who is content. Who is that? Noone" Bejamine Franklin

  "Money is better that poverty, if only for financial reasons" Woody Allen

   What else? Anything negative about money is much to be listed. Name it and you'll surely have it. Cliche?


   From these past weeks, which started after the examination this MIdterm, i worry alot about my financial needs. It is not that i am an empty glass like Argentina but i'm somehow shakened like that of Philippine Peso.

   Yes. I'm a scholar only if i have my allowance dispensed in my atm card. Funny to know that i gamble even in withdrawing the minimum amount in maintaining my account so that to bridge in just a little extra. How ironic, my last two words? Well, it's exactly what i'm doing. I rather want to use extra as something not enough yet it can stand the elasticity of my needs.

    I have nothing in between holiness and being evil. Nay, don't get me wrong. I'm not that frustrated to balm on something that would heal wounds in askin-deep way.

    Religious teachers would say, money cannot be brought to heaven when you died. But, is it fair that a person would risk not to sin while dying on his death bed. Or, have some penny to support a rodent-like living risking your soul to be burnt in hell. Which is which ---which is witch? (laughters) I am just making concrete canvass of reality here.  I'm not discriminating plutocrats here for i know they are also doing there stuffs of conscience---i pray they are doing it well.

    Opps, i'm not yet in that scenario, if you would mind. At least, in my case i'm quite sure what to do despite money breakdown. In my case, i'm furtunate enough. I can smile. I can pray. I can think healhty thoughts. What about those who don't? My piece of cake, " I'll pray for them", which i always did.

     Every time i would encounter such i would silently utter a pray besides giving them a mercy-hunk-of-metal from my pocket.

   This coming February events are piled-up like mountains infront of my way. And, i want to make things to be multi-tasking. But, ofcourse money is always at the picture. Why not go for what is best despite shortcoming of resources? After all, that's what really is known of  being PINOY. Fight with the best skills even having the poorest weaponry. The catch is, true warriors are dignified by his skills in playing the battle ahead of him not in playing like as gods with there mighty warfare.

   This is life; full of paradox. You might disagree to me but it really is.

    However, lets be glad that we are living despite insufficiency--- no matter what, life can still be worth living.

    I believe in luck and hardship in success--- though, money makes sense at the back of my mind.

     Flying with the splendid wings of money is not that bad at all; however, you should carry along with you an egg-fellow you'll be seeing  to hatch in his shell, flap his wings and eventually will be flying his own span in the ocean of reality.